warfare

I've been under attack much lately, if not for the past three months. And that's OK, as I finally recognize what all of this is.

For years I've been a huge believer in spiritual warfare: being attacked by the things we cannot see and so forth. Unfortunately, the handful of christians I am surrounded by (mostly my wife's family) don't know or believe in too much of this subject. So seeking prayer, counsel, and help is dismal for the time being.

In the physical: I have no income, no local identity as of yet (except maybe as 'that guy from Texas'), we are living on the resources we brought with us from a couple of house sales in Texas last spring, and I am making our basement livable space by remodeling it top to bottom.

So in other words, we're spending a lot of money with nothing coming in. I've sought the lord on this numerous times, both before and during this remodel process. So far I hear silence. But all arrows point in the direction I'm going in. I a) have the time and b) am gaining massive experience in building/remodeling techniques in Canada (ie: moisture prevention and insulation techniques).

Add christmas mayhem in the mix and you have one guy like me going nuts. I haven't felt this much stress in my life.

But I trust all has a purpose. Hell, back in 2006 our life was dryer than dry. And The Creator still provided. Go figure.

These attacks have had me doubting my abilities, character, and purpose. I often wonder if moving to Canada was the right thing, being that this is a damn expensive place to dwell. But coins show up in fishes mouths on occasions, so I've seen.

I finally recognize these as attacks and not a 'huge mistake' on my part.

I request prayer back up. Thank you

the landscape

I recently had a short dream where my cousin Mark and I were sitting at the Reach Out. There, someone had donated an airplane, one of those small, two-seater prop job types. "Oh good", said Mark. "Now we can fly over the Reach Out and get a good view of the entire region."

I really thought this was significant in a way only a dream can be to the individual who received it. I've been wanting to know exactly why the Creator brought us to this remote location to raise our family. And I've been wanting to know what was going on beyond what my eyes could see.

As mentioned before, in the native communities there is a huge blanket of distrust between them and white people. There is also much suicide and depression.

But within many white people throughout Canada, there is general unhappiness. I have met very few who truly enjoy or appreciate their job, career, and overall life. I know this is common throughout the US as well, but it seems more so in Canada.

Canadians enjoy higher wages and more benefits (health coverage, etc) than the average American. But there's no incentive within their jobs to work better. There's no joy in their life as evident to more smoking and drinking than I've ever seen. People are always looking for escape of some sort.

In Texas, I knew many who earned $7 - $10 an hour with no benefits yet were so full of life.

It seems like there is a huge void for Jesus around here.