Well, in a last ditch final hail mary play, I accepted the position at the local lumber yard.
This was not my expected course of action. But I couldn't come up with a solid reason from the creator to not accept this job.
My final condition upon acceptance was that I couldn't start immediately as I am in the final throws of finishing our basement renos, possibly 1-2 weeks. They were OK with the delay. So that was my confirmation of sorts to accept this job.
It's a fairly responsible job as it will be my duty to manage the whole yard and load shipments with 100% accuracy. Many lumber shipments are headed up north into extremely remote locations in the Province where a $50 box of nails would cost the local contractor $250. So there's a little pressure. But I hope to hand it to the lord and not fret after hours.
And I suppose there is a small chance something better could show up in the next week or two since I haven't signed any papers, etc
The thought of having a full time job for the first time in twelve years scares the hell out of me. It'll be a huge culture shock. But what's new...
Thank you all for praying and for your wisdom and guidance.
After leaving a resume and talking to the managers two months ago, I finally got a call from the local lumber yard. They have offered me a full-time job.
I would be the yard foreman, reporting only to the top manager but with two other people ahead of me in their chain of command.
The deal is that I am sure I don't want this job. Or if I should take it.
During my face to face job offer yesterday, I still gathered that the manager and his wife don't particularly value their other employees, based on various back biting comments they've made.
The hours are five to six days a week. And these hours are not set and rigid, leaving opportunity for abuse of my time, etc.
I have several possible remodeling jobs lined up in the coming weeks and months that would pay more than this full time job. But as usual, they are hit or miss.
The creator knows that this kind of gig is not where my heart and passion lie. But in Genesis, Joseph had a huge call on his life. And he fumbled into a long detour to get where he was going.
I suppose this job could be a detour in my life in order to get back to where I want to be: being available to people, working random remodeling and landscaping jobs, and returning to house flipping someday. Also music - which is an identity that is currently being resurrected as I jam with guys in nearby Capitol City once a week.
I told the manager that I would meet him face to face with my answer in one week (Wednesday March 23).
Pray with me if you will: Creator of the universe, is this lumber yard job offer a detour, or a distraction? In the name of Jesus...
Well, a corner of sorts was turned.
Today we received more than twice the amount of money needed to finish up our basement renovations. It came from the most unlikely source, especially considering the amount.
Finishing the basement renos was the top prayer to the creator for the past month or so. It's been hard to not feel like a failure of some sort since I am a big believer in "counting the costs" etc.
He provided for us. Thank you Lord.
One of my dear friends back home, my former Jedi master whom I learned house flipping and remodeling from, gave me a random call the other day.
He had been praying for me. For ME mind you, as his own six year old son with severe health issues lied at death's door. Thankfully, his son's health turned around for the better last I've heard.
As he prayed for me, he felt as though the creator gave him a picture of a corner. As in, I would be turning a corner soon.
I've been hanging on to this word for the last two weeks or so. It's all I've got, in addition to a whole host of miracles and testimonies that brought us here to River Dog in the first place.
I have never awaited the coming of Spring like I have this year. A Saskatchewan Winter will do that to you.
In Texas, March means everything starts turning green immediately. It's mostly weeds, but green weeds none the less.
Here, March means everything is still white. Just like it's been since November when my plane landed from my return trip to Texas.
But I'm starting to see LESS white.
Ice is melting in the street, revealing the long forgotten asphalt. Less WHITE, more ASPHALT! WOO-HOO.
Like Joshua (in the bible book of the same name), I am holding on to courage. God gave us this town. This land. This whole gig is not a fluke. Provision and purpose will arrive in due time.
A corner will be turned. I am sure of it.
I'm really trying to seek the kingdom first and let everything else take care of itself.
(Trying.)
Truthfully, I have entered this new land. I can see the grapes, but the giants are scaring the hell out of me.
(Rid me of this fear lord.)
I am determined to be victorious through this. The creator did not bring us here to die, go broke, be made fools, have no identity, feel worthless.
(So god, why do I feel broke, foolish, like a nobody, and worthless?)
Sometimes I thought I could walk on water. I guess I've always had crutches.
Dear god, thank you for trials.
After checking up on the dismal lumber yard gig last week, a local French bistro owner, Anne-Marie (where I passed a brief audition to play music in her place this spring/summer) gave me the name of a home remodeling business owner.
I called him and met with him at the River Dog Diner the following Saturday morning.
All I can say is that EVERYTHING about the meeting went positive. He is definitely someone I would want to work for. He maintains a respectable schedule (M-F 8am-4:30), pays VERY well, and seemed to like me. He had planned to contact me Monday after seeing if one of his new employees would work out. The new guy hadn't showed up for a few days or something.
So Monday night I get an email from the business owner which said his employee showed back up after being ill for three days. He was going to try him out some more but really wanted to do something with me.
It sounds very promising. But I'm so weary of waiting. I'm going to keep looking. But I want this to work out too.
I confess, I have avoided writing any reports for a while. Primarily because I tire of using this blog as a whine-fest. I could write on the handful of folks I've met and the slow intertwined adventures that may begin. But I am low these days.
The basement reno project, my daily existence and lifeline, is oh so close to being complete. But our financial outlook is dismal. The choices that I clearly see are: 1) finish the basement and be flat broke or 2) start working (assuming there is work for me somewhere) and hope for better days ahead to finish the basement.
I think way too much. And hacking away at the basement gives me too much time alone to think.
I wonder if I've failed. If I missed something entirely in this whole assignment change. If I was supposed to move at all. These are nonsense thoughts I'm sure. But they plague me anyway.
On the bright side, my wife was given a job cleaning a local bank building 5 nights a week for about an hour each night. It pays around $20/hour. Viva la Canada to that. And I am being strongly considered for a position with a local lumber yard in running the yard as well as installation crew. It would be steady work. It's been a long time since I had 40+ hour a week employment. I don't know if that is what the creator is giving me or what. I talked to the owners of the lumber yard yesterday for a good 30 minutes. I gathered that they had no conscious in over-working and under-paying their employees. That left me feeling bleak.
Maybe the creator will open another door for me soon. I pray consistently on this subject. I hear only silence. The silence is making me nervous and feeling somewhat worthless.
I want to do independent house flipping again someday. Maybe this lumber yard gig is a path in that direction, etc
I plead again for your prayer coverage on this matter: the lord knows what I want and what I am good at. He's never put me somewhere that I wasn't meant to be. Maybe he is yet again preparing me for what I want...
Well, in a last ditch final hail mary play, I accepted the position at the local lumber yard.
